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Postby ColinS » Mon Oct 16, 2017 8:40 am

To all retired EX Military, please take a few moments to read the following
You may soon receive the letter below from the ADF time to dig out your old kit.....Not that it would still fit..

Under the Emergency Powers Act (1939) as amended by the Defence Act (1997, you are hereby notified that you are required to place yourself on standby for possible compulsory military service in the British/American & Australian Conflict with North Korea.
You may shortly be ordered to depart for Japan where you will join either the 3rd Wing of the 22nd Tactical Joint Operations Airborne Group or The Imperial Japanese Suicidal Conscripts Flight.
The Regulars are too busy and short staffed to be there themselves.
Due to the recent rundown of the Navy it will be necessary for you to make your own way to the combat zone.
The Australian Government has been able to negotiate a 20% discount on one-way trips to Japan with Virgin Airlines and you are strongly advised to take advantage of this offer.
Because of cutbacks in Government expenditure in recent years, it will be necessary for you to provide yourself with the following equipment as soon as possible:
Tins of Spam*
Combat trousers (preferably khaki ? but no disco camouflage)* False moustaches* Incontinence pads* Gas mask (or canary)* Map of the combat zone (O.S. 1:2800 leisure map of Korea is suitable)* Travel Scrabble (for long hours sitting behind the hangar while US forces hit schools and hospitals with "smart" bombs* Sun Cream* All current medications* (for those with multiple conditions, a dedicated RAAF Hercules aircraft will be commissioned to transport all your drugs, medicines, creams, mobility aids and therapy equipment ....and should arrive within two months of your arrival in theatre).
If you are in a position to afford it, we would like you to join our scheme to adopt a Fighter Jet (The ADF are currently offering a great deal on ex registered Lightnings and Phantoms) this offer is only available whilst stocks last.
We should like to reassure you that in the unlikely event of anything going wrong, you will receive a free burial in the graveyard of your choice, and your next of kin will be entitled to the new War pension of $3.75 per calendar month, index-linked but subject to means testing, and fully repayable should our side eventually lose.
There will be little time for formal military refresher training before your departure and so we advise that you should hire DVDs of the following films and try to pick up as many tips as you can whilst you watch these films:
The Guns of Navarone*
Blazing Saddles*
The Battle of Britain*
Kelly's Heroes*
A Bridge Too Far*
The Longest Day*
Apocalypse Now*
The Light Horse*Anzac’s
The odd angry shot*
The cruel sea* :o
Enlisted April 1960 DEE April 1969 L/Ck R56992 Cerberus, Penguin, Quickmatch,Abatrossx2,Gascoyne,Kimbla, Kuttabul x3 (old,new & wardroom), Melbournex2 (ships company & admirals straff) Archer whilst in RANR.
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